The Most Irritating 'Guy Thing' Ever
by Onirei Kirara
Summary: Yuffie is fed up with all these stupid men in her life.  In fact, if it weren't for that cute guy Roxas at the cafe, she may just give up on the opposite sex forever.  [Yuffie!rant, not romance]


Dear whoever,

I, Yuffie Kisaragi, am here (well, sort of) to tell you what the most irritating, FRUSTRATING, stupid guy thing is. Living with several guys myself, you should really take my opinion into account of—whatever it is that you're considering.

THE MOST IRRITATING STUPID GUY THING:

When you ask them to do something, they _never manage_ to 'get around to it', but when they ask YOU to do something, they badger you until it's done! That is, even if they _let _you finish it, because 'you're not doing it right'!

As I mentioned before, I live with several guys, and one other girl. (Not counting the crazy artist Namine that lives next door, but somehow wound up in our basement.) Preferably I would not be here, but those laws and stuff state that I can't live alone until I'm eighteen unless I'm emancipated. Well, Ms. Aeris won't emancipate me, because she's mean. So I'm stuck here. But the good thing is, I have PUH-lenty of examples to prove my point.

So the other day I asked Riku (the pervy guy), to take down his laundry basket so that Ms. Aeris wouldn't have to do it. I mean, it's only nice. It's not like it's a selfish request, or anything, but he didn't do it! I know this, because as I was taking _my _laundry basket downstairs, he dumped all his yucky clothes into it so I would be forced to take it down! ('Cuz there's no way I'm touching his dirty underwear, even to take it out.)

Have I proved my point? Here's another one;

Monday, Leon (the quiet guy), was out fixing loose shingles on the roof. As I walked past him, fully intent on going to the café to stalk Roxas (my future husband, too bad he doesn't know me yet!), he asked me for a hammer. Ok, no big deal. So I go inside and grab the hammer that Aeris uses to hang up pictures. I bring it outside, and hand it to him. He looks at me like I'm stupid.

And like that MALE thing that they do, he rolls his eyes and goes into the house to get another one.

..Ok, so it probably doesn't help that after that I chucked the stupid hammer at him, screaming, "JUST ASK ME TO GO GET ANOTHER ONE!!!" Needless to say, I spent the rest of the day at the café brooding and staring at Roxas' behind.

Alright, so that probably wasn't the best example. Let me try another one.

Cloud (the moody guy) and I were grocery shopping. Usually Ms. Aeris does this, but she was down with a cold. So I ask him (politely, I might add) to go grab a bunch of bananas. He acts like he doesn't even hear me, so I have to go get them myself. And I hate bananas.

And that's not even the worst of it. Later on, he realizes he forgot the frozen pizza. So he sends me to go get some. Now granted, I spent about two minutes considering which type of pizza to get, but it's a big decision! He didn't HAVE to come after me and wordlessly grab pepperoni. He _could_ have waited. And I hate pepperoni!

It gets to be too much for me sometimes. When I complain to Ms. Aeris about it, she just shrugs and says that's how they are. (Which Roxas isn't, of course.) She tried to explain to me that it's just like me spending too much time in the bathroom at the movie theater, when the movie has already started.

That is totally unrelated. People may not be able to see what your make-up looks like when the lights are off, but what about when the lights turn back on?? HUH??

Really, I'm not sure I can handle it too much longer. In fact, it got to the point where when Sora (the good-natured guy) walked into the kitchen and asked me when dinner was going to be done, I screamed,

"ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGHHH!" and started spurting blood out my nose.

I think I have provided sufficient evidence for the most irritating, stupid guy thing ever. Or maybe several of them. Really, if I didn't have my Roxas, I might have gone lesbo already.

…Too bad he doesn't know me yet.

Yours truly,

[The Great Ninja Yuffie Kisaragi

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Yes, I know I should be working on my other stories. xP Review anyways?


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